Do I really need the thing I’m asking for? Can I handle the situation myself or just go without? Can I afford to offer something in return? Will this bribe change people’s opinion of me? Will that make my life harder down the road? Will the bribe become an expected part of our relationship?
There’s a better chance the person will agree to a specific action, rather than a vague objective. For example, “helping me move” could be a three-hour time investment or a week-long investment. Give specific hours and a clear description of what you’re asking the person to do: “I need to borrow your truck Friday and Saturday, from 5-9 p. m. , and need your help moving large furniture at that time. ” Be as specific as possible about what you need, so the person you’re bribing won’t want to say “no” off the bat.
In our moving example, you want to skip anyone you know is lazy or too weak to lift heavy furniture for you. People who are organized efficient, strong and active, and who own trucks will be most useful to you.
For help moving, you might offer to cover gas costs, then sweeten the pot with dinner and drinks once the move is complete. Open-ended IOUs (“I owe you”) can be an effective bribe. Be ready to return the favor when called on, though. The fewer people who can supply what you want, the more expensive the bribe needs to be. For example, plenty of people can help you move — you can get by offering pizza and beer. But if you’re bribing a friend to quit smoking, only one person can provide that favor. You’ll need a heftier bribe. [2] X Research source
You might call it a negotiation: “Mom, I’ll do extra chores for a whole month if you let me go to this concert. " Frame it as a compromise: “If you waive the late fees on my account, I will sign a new 2-year contract with your company. That way, we both win. " Frame it as a fee: “If you help me move, I’ll pay you for your labor and gas. "
Sometimes, you need favors quickly. In that case, ease into the topic slowly. Talk about how difficult the situation is for you and how much you need help before asking for the favor. Especially when talking to someone you don’t know well, you want the person to feel bad for you before you ask for their help.
Judge the starting point for negotiation based on your knowledge of the person. If you start too low, the person might get offended that you thought you could bribe them so cheaply. If you start too high, then you might reach the limit of what you can offer before the person feels he’s been offered a good deal. [5] X Research source
Many people may only agree to a bribe if the they’re “paid” upfront. “We’ll go out for drinks on me as soon as we’re finished moving my furniture. " In some situations, the bribe might be drawn out over time, such as with the example of bribing a friend to stop smoking. In this case, you can offer the bribe in smaller chunks based on progress. “Every week you go without smoking, I’ll take you out for a nice dinner on the weekend. “[6] X Research source
