For example, if your friend says that their ex cheated several times, don’t say something like “well, you should have left him once you knew he was a flirt. ” ‘Should haves’ will be counterproductive in this conversation.

Provide them with a tissue if you have some on hand. If you know that crying is difficult for the person, then try to let them know that it is okay to cry. For example, you can say something like, “It’s okay. Just let it out. ” Cry with them if you feel so inclined!

Remember that you would want this same courtesy if you were going through a breakup. Try to be understanding.

Think back on all the times that you have been foolish and in love. You probably did some things that your friend thought were unreasonable but did not need to be judged for it. Practice empathy and understanding with your friend.

You might say “I know you are so hurt. I know how much you loved your ex. Breakups really suck. ”[6] X Research source

You might say something like “I just want you to know that even in this difficult time, you are still one of the most wonderful people I know and I’m so lucky to be your friend. ”

You might go see a movie together; make sure it’s not a romantic movie. That might upset them. Go out shopping for a bit or to a bookstore. Anything to divert their attention from their heartache. Be sure to remind them that you are still there for them if they need to talk now and then.

Go get haircuts or get your hair done together. Go get a massage or have a spa day. Get pedicures or manicures.

If you don’t want to go to the gym, go for a walk or a run instead. If your friend starts to feel better from the exercise, be sure to remind them that it is okay to feel good in spite of what they are going through.

This will make them feel special and cared for.

You can also program your own number under their exes contact info so if they do get the temptation, they will call you instead.

Remind them that if they feel weak, they can always reach out to you.

You might say something like “remember that you broke up because he disrespected your mother. Don’t just remember him for the good he did, remember the bad, too. ”

Say “I want you to know that I am here for you through thick and thin. I know you are feeling very down but anytime you need me, I’m there. ” You may also want to help them brainstorm some of the other people they can reach out to when they need someone.

Encourage them to try something new like a new sport or instrument or perhaps even learning a new language. Ask them if there is something they always wanted to do but didn’t have the time.

You might call your mutual friend and say something like “Hey, I’m here with ____ now and things aren’t looking so great. Can you come over and maybe bring some ice cream and a movie?” Pay attention if your friends has any cuts, or begins to engage in risky behaviors such as drinking or using drugs. Consider their past history, and assess if there is any reason to worry that they might harm themselves. If so, make sure you reach out to an adult, such as parent or teacher, or contact a suicide prevention hotline, such as the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline if you’re in the United States, which can be reached by calling or texting 988. [13] X Trustworthy Source National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Suicide prevention network operating a toll-free 24/7 hotline for anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts or emotional distress Go to source